How to Create Your Own Joy: Tips for Homesteaders to Overcome Feeling Left Out

Hay mama! So you (and that adorable family of yours) weren’t invited to any 4th of July celebrations yesterday either? Eh, no biggie, right? Well actually, it kind of hurts, doesn’t it? To never be invited? That seems to be the story of my life. I was always the one who hosted BBQs and parties and get-togethers, and always invited everyone! We had the BEST times, yet, I’d notice while scrolling through Facebook that those same people I always invited to my shenanigans would never reciprocate the invite.

Since moving from the big city to a tiny town out in the country, where we homestead and homeschool fulltime, my circle of “friends” has dwindled even more so. Which I’m not necessarily complaining about because my besties are just a video call away anytime I need them. But it would still be nice to be invited to the shindigs you see your neighbors and community members throwing, right? It’s not fun to sit in your own home and wonder about why you and your family weren’t invited… do they not like us? Are we not good enough? Are my kids too loud? Have I said/done anything to offend them?

It’s easy to let our minds spiral with these questions, but let’s take a step back and breathe. Sometimes, it’s not about us at all. People get busy, they have their own circles, or maybe they just assume we’re too busy with our homesteading life. Instead of dwelling on the what-ifs, let’s flip the script:

Reach Out: Sometimes, a simple, friendly gesture can open doors. Send a neighbor a jar of your homemade jam or fresh eggs with a note saying you’d love to get to know them better. Breaking the ice can pave the way for future invites.
Be Proactive: If you notice a community event or a neighborhood gathering, don’t hesitate to ask if you can join. Most people are happy to include others but might not always think to extend the invitation.
Join Local Groups: Look for local homesteading, homeschooling, or community groups. Joining these can help you meet like-minded individuals and make you feel more connected. Online forums or social media groups can also be great resources for finding local events.
Create Your Own Traditions: If the invites aren’t rolling in, start your own traditions. Host a monthly potluck, a seasonal harvest festival, or a craft night. This not only brings people to you but also showcases the wonderful homesteading lifestyle you embrace.
Stay Positive: Remember that not being invited doesn’t define your worth or likability. Focus on the joy and fulfillment you get from your family, your homestead, and the wonderful life you’re creating.

By taking these steps, we can turn those feelings of exclusion into opportunities for connection and growth. It’s all about putting ourselves out there and embracing the wonderful community around us.

Nevertheless, these feelings still indeed suck, so let’s chat about some ways to overcome feeling this way and what we can do about not being invited.

First off, let’s shake off that funk and remember that we are strong, independent homesteading mamas who can turn any day into a celebration! Just because we didn’t get an invite doesn’t mean we can’t create our own shindig, right in our own farm backyard. Grab those kiddos, your husband, and let’s make some memories!

Host Your Own Bash: Who says we need an invitation to have a good time? Light up the grill, gather around the fire pit, and roast marshmallows with your family. Let the kids stay up late and catch fireflies. As homeschoolers, you know every moment is a teachable one, so why not throw in a little history lesson about independence while you’re at it? And as homemakers, you’ve got that special touch to make any gathering cozy and welcoming.
Get Creative: Turn your FOMO into JOMO (Joy of Missing Out)! Plan a themed family night – how about a pirate adventure in the yard or a backyard camping trip? Set up tents, tell ghost stories, and enjoy the great outdoors right at home. Your homestead is your playground, and the possibilities are endless.
Community Connection: It’s time to show those neighbors what they’re missing out on. Organize a small, friendly get-together and invite them over. Share your bountiful garden harvest, homemade jam, or fresh eggs. It’s a great way to showcase your homesteading lifestyle and maybe even inspire a few new friendships.
Embrace the Solitude: Sometimes, a little peace and quiet is just what we need. Use this time to reflect, relax, and recharge. Dive into that book you’ve been meaning to read or work on a new homesteading project. Whether it’s crafting, gardening, or teaching the kids a new skill, there’s always something fulfilling to do.
Virtual Fun: Set up a virtual party with your besties. Everyone can join in from their own homesteads, sharing stories, recipes, and laughs. It’s a wonderful reminder that distance doesn’t diminish the bond you share.
Focus on the Positives: Remember why you chose this beautiful life. The simple joys of watching your kids play in the yard, the satisfaction of growing your own food, and the peace that comes from being close to nature. These are the moments that truly matter and make life sweet.

So, my fellow homesteaders, homeschoolers, and homemakers, let’s lift our spirits and our glasses to the freedom we enjoy every day. We are the masters of our own celebrations, and we know how to make the most out of every situation. Cheers to creating your own joy, making new traditions, and living life to the fullest on your farm!

Remember, the heart of homesteading is about self-sufficiency, resilience, and finding joy in the simple things. You’ve got this, mama!